Did I really get probed by Space Aliens in Florida?

Obviously, I can’t prove that my doctors were Space Aliens as I never had a chance to probe them, but I can make a very strong case that the Doctors were using Alien Technology. (Start the story at the beginning)

Now the premise of Independence Day was that the government had captured an Alien Space Craft and been working to discover it’s secrets since the 1947, Roswell, New Mexico Incident. A sub-plot was about an alcoholic pilot who claimed to be beamed up by aliens and probed in a manner which invoked such intense pain that he drank to forget the experience because no one believed him until the Alien mothership arrived to destroy earth.

1947 is a clear cut date which establishes a potential cut off for earth based technology and Alien Based Technology. We can expect that the earth based technology should be based on the premise of do no harm while healing and the Alien Technology just wants scientific answers without regard to human pain and suffering.

X Ray

The oldest test in the medical testing arsenal is the X-ray discovered by Wilhelm Rontgen in 1895 when he published a picture of his wife’s hand. He won a Nobel prize for his efforts in 1905. Now this test is somewhat dangerous but I am sure that is true of most of them. On the positive side it is painless and non intimidating. This is definitely a human test.

Electrocardiogram

Willem Einthoven, working in Leiden, Netherlands, invented the EKG (electrocardiogram) in 1903 and in 1924, he was awarded the Nobel Prize for his work. This is a very non intrusive method where they glue some wires too you and take some readings. You really don’t know you are being tested. This is a very humane test obviously invented by humans.

Echocardiogram

John Wild (1914–2009) first used ultrasound to assess the thickness of bowel tissue as early as 1949 based on ultrasound research dating to 1930. For his early work he has been described as the “father of medical ultrasound”. In 1953 the Swedish Scientists were the first to view the heart. Properly performed ultrasound poses no known risks to the patient. This is a very humane test obviously invented by humans. In addition, it is doubtful the United States Army would share secrets with Sweden.

Magnetic Resonance Imaging

The original name for MRI was Nuclear Magnetic Resonance Imaging and this was for a test which took long periods of time for a person to be shoved in a tube which was slightly smaller than their body and listened to a noise that was louder than a freight train roaring down the track. Obviously MRI is a vast improvement in the name even though the rest of the conditions remain the same.

In 1967 the first images of the inside of a body were taken. In the 1970 for the first brain MRI, the subject had to sit still for eight hours and the images took 72 hours to develop. In 1971, Raymond Damadian proved that magnetic resonance could be used to help detect diseases by the different nuclear magnetic relaxation times between tissues and tumors. In 1972, the second MRI image was taken. It was two dimensional which showed the length and width. The first MR image was published in 1973.

When evaluating the cruel and unusual conditions of this test and the fear factors invoked, it is hard to believe that a human invented it and MRI is more likely to be from an alien culture where people are much smaller in size and communicate by telepathy while ignoring sound. In addition to being post 1947 Technology, these are exactly the properties attributed to the Roswell Aliens.

Nerve Conduction Studies

To perform nerve conduction studies, surface electrodes are first fastened to the hand and wrist. Small electric shocks are then applied to the nerves in the fingers, wrist, and forearm to measure how fast a signal travels through the nerves that control movement and sensation. Hardyck and his researchers were the first (1966) practitioners to use the science behind this test. In the early 1980s, Cram and Steger introduced a clinical method for scanning a variety of muscles using an EMG sensing device.

This was definitely the most discomfort of any test I had other than the the Friday night MRI. I cant imagine a human believing that they can get valuable information by electrocuting a person and measuring the response. It’s easier for me to believe that this post 1947 technology came from an alien culture and reached the medical profession from Roswell Research.

Electromyography

From The University of Maryland Medical Center: In electromyography, “a fine, sterile, wire electrode is inserted briefly into a muscle, and the electrical activity is displayed on a viewing screen. Electromyography can be painful and is less accurate than nerve conduction. Some experts question, in fact, whether it adds any valuable diagnostic information.”

It is not until the middle of the 1980s that integration techniques in electrodes had sufficiently advanced to allow batch production of the required small and lightweight instrumentation and amplifiers.

Once again, this test is post 1947 Roswell, and I am sure that an Space Alien can ascertain more information from the test than the University of Maryland Author. This is definitely a crossover test, not only may it be invented by an alien technology, it may take an alien to meaningfully read it.

Conclusion

There is a clear-cut demarcation in medical tests developed before 1947 and those developed more recently. The earlier tests are based on humane treatment and the more recent ones all have cruel and unusual aspects. It is not much of a stretch for me to accept that the intergalactic Space Program of the Space Aliens ran out of money and the abandoned Aliens adapted to our life form and moved to Florida to practice really advanced space age medicine.

In the end I guess I don’t really care if they are Space Aliens or not just so I personally get the best care possible.

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One Response to “Did I really get probed by Space Aliens in Florida?”

  1. Tarpon Springs Adventures « Too Young To Be Old! Says:

    […] is a gracious hostess and when I was here in May to get probed by aliens. Tracy and I went to visit and have lunch at Hellas a Greek […]

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